"the only thing that can stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun" (Wayne LaPierre, NRA - National Rifle Association/USA)
there's a storm on the horizon
it's been brewing for some time now
becoming more and more visible
it's getting closer
and closer
it was a game we boys played as kids in Woodstock Ontario back in the 60's people of colour only on television in black and white
one dressed as a cowboy and another as an indian the cowboy is a good guy, the indian is bad (obviously and in keeping with the script)
harmless fun really, stuff we saw on our 14" monochrome TVs Daniel Boone and F-Troop - shows like that after school
1965 twenty years before MTV thirty years before the internet forty years before the iPhone fifty years before Donald Trump what-ever
spreading peanut butter on my bleached white wonder bread in a world bereft of imagination; dimension my afternoon treat with grape jelly sometimes
in Ontario Canada - normal stuff that meant nothing
just eating - chewing - swallowing
oh right ... commercials the price we pay to watch television "wrongful death" and "dog bites" my personal faves
oK, I really got it later on in life
visiting Ybor City Florida - near Tampa in late December 2004 New Year's eve actually - BIG football game - parade it's still early, drifting towards the midnight hour it's warm here - tropic thunder in the distance most men packin' a concealed firearm just in case someone needs an adjustment
stepping off the plane in Fort Lauderdale a week earlier leaving a brutal cold winter in Toronto thinking - wow - this is paradise palm trees - warm weather here realizing something different in a few short days
right, like everyone's obese here. ok - half transexual transformation billboards - personal injury law firms super-sized families at Denny's whipped cream emporium gorging on the American dream - scrambled eggs and steak or sausages, pancakes home fried taters and gravy texas toast and jam pie and ice cream
all you can eat git-ter while she's hot
ordering way more than they need because they can wrap it up and take it home to munch on later and later heated up in the microwave
really getting the hypocrisy in American culture all that "land of the free - home of the brave", bullshit
but mostly really seeing it for the first time how white Americans think they're better and entitled to more than anyone else
my mom had recently passed and I was going through a caustic catharsis culminating
introspection, trying to find something - anything real - meaningful - awake
why am I in this place?
it's dead here
nothing but anger and sadness pretending to be proud boner - I mean bonus
free parking on the outskirts of the city where the colored folk live on the dark periphery having been pushed out of the inner core years earlier
no street lights here - garbage strewn everywhere a parasite infested mongrel pissing on a crooked hydro pole that familiar disturbing look up whilst echoing off the cracked pavement a winter wonderland turned tropical
paradise
colored's not welcomed
ok, the odd Cuban - maybe Mexican (a stretch) but they look out of place here nervously trying to fit in but really not
everyone is really intoxicated
because that is what's on the agenda
pretentious paleface - the narcissism rampant/abundant
football jocks and grimey girls in skimpy slippery sexy teasing the boys - cause that's what's real now no apologies, no regrets and all OK - cause
"got my hands up, they're playing my song"
It's a party in the U.S.A.
I'm stunned and numb looking out and over at the passing parade guy's holding his beer up and yelling at them "hey baby - right here - right here" grabbing his crotch
maybe all this? is just a bad dream don't get me wrong I see the world as a good place where change can still happen
where we can co-exist painlessly but it's still important, to actually look at what's really happening because millions minions
onion dipper
so hey dude - fuck-nuts just who do you think you are anyways?
excuse me sir I've had a little too much to drink
but I would like to shake your hand you are an inspiration to me and I'd like to thank you for that
COWBOYS AND INDIANS
staying awake
I will embrace everyone equally because I and millions like ME don't subscribe to this narrow point of view
diversity vs division it's a no brainer so why?
maybe it's a glitch in the system a rogue app - I can install Malware and fix this - ok gimme a sec in the meantime?
It's a party in the U.S.A. let's RAWK the Britney song is on YUM - hot - fuk this shit
In May 1991, I received an OAC/Ontario Arts Council grant to fly out to Spearmint Lake (60 km northeast of Chapleau), a remote lake only accessible by air - to record an album of music celebrating northern Ontario. Rented van w/gear, driving up alone that early August and flying out, I set up a make-shift studio in the large tent, powered by a generator buried back in the woods and recorded sounds from the lake/woods (exterior) and integrated those sounds into an ambient mix of layered music synthesizers and samplers all inspired by the location. When I returned to Toronto and began mixing it, I realized that I was 10 minutes short of having a full album, so I wrote 2 more pieces, Gone Forever and Frogs in my home studio in Parkdale that autumn in memory of my time at Spearmint months earlier. My wife Jody Terio had gathered some early morning frogs on a pond at her Aunt Joyce's out in the country (Uxbridge), through a binaural/ambisonic microphone onto a portable digital audio tape recorder and I integrated them with what I had laid down at home and Frogs was born. This piece sounds best under a good pair of headphones and in a darkened room.
I recently gathered HD images from the internet that reminded me of Spearmint and assembled this in Final Cut in a few hours.It was a magical 10 days alone in the wilderness, surrounded by wildlife, the aurora and a black bear which was spooky scary but exhilarating.
More pictures and stories about my time at Spearmint Lake in my blog below entitled 'NOCTURNE'
when I can't write I feel like a block of stone dreaming alone of nothing
a boat without eyes for the oars and no horizon
G E T H S E M A N E
nothing to lose
music evokes pictures
pictures provoke feelings
one thing leads to another and ... here we go - always at 5 am a deaf woman sitting alone
looking out a window
an all American boy filling his face at a hot dog eating contest champion eater - 3 years in a row 51 dogs - 10 minutes a beggar in the garden of Gethsemane holding up an empty cup staring into the night no one listening his last night on earth
caroling crickets
a mother calling out her son's name
only to realize he's gone in anguish; "Aadish come" again no words left behind no trace
hearing it - now seeing it
years passing a trailer park just out of town in Cabot Arkansas
she's been alone for days big bag of Lays and another beer at 1pm
ashtray is full and the place is a mess staring blankly at the TV (fuming)
plus size house-coat
eating and screaming at Springer
because that f*cking bitch needs to die
they're bleeping the sound but we know what they're saying - filling in the blanks reading their lips
turn them on each other
it's something my Dad taught me watching you through my sterile scope analysing - improvising
curious - cautious
me with money - you not
common and yet ironic
because I can see you
but you can't see me because I am your
micro-manager
something still not right looking over my shoulder
you see - it's supposed to be the other way around it's ass backwards
confused
I'm bathing in bubbles
surveilling the dark shadows 24/7 and still there's this haunting feeling in that
It's a message to you alien creatures: translated into English - my language It's what you see, entering our atmosphere A blue ball with brown blotches and bolts of lightning You could probably land on the blue or the brown - preferably but stay away from the dark parts that light up because they are dangerous Our sun is a star yes - a man Our moon is just a rock - a woman They sustain and heal us, so that we may live In our shelters - homes or houses and give birth to smaller humans who carry on after we die or cease to exist Our children Light skin and dark skin continually presents problems here Ok we don't always get along We fight a lot
We humans are really not so bad Under-developed but basically good natured - really
Wehave our moments when we love others
Then we have others when we fear
Especially you- an intrusion
We pray to Gods - different ones depending
on what part of this world we live in
Religion serves and protects us Even though many of us aren't religious
It's something we've designed/made up
to appease the fear and suffering
ongoing and unrelenting
That strips us of our humility - our ability
to empathize with others
Despite our worship
Most will fear you - mostly because you're different
Because you pose a very real threat to our survival
