Friday, 3 June 2016


“There are wounds that never show on the body 
that are deeper and more hurtful 
than anything that bleeds.” 

Laurell Hamilton, Mistral's Kiss

t r a u m a t i z e d


we all have been traumatized
in one way shape or form

at some point in our lives - earlier on perhaps
out of nowhere - incoming
when we least expect it

scared silly
ya, takes one to know one
hiding fear is essential to survival 

quietly consuming a yummy mac & cheese supper
then BAM - like a brick through the window

maybe it was our parents arguing
and Dad losing his shit - the screaming violence
not necessarily physical and yet here we are again
fearful nonetheless - just children - watching
it all go down - helpless

I see it in the animals that we care for
my feral cat bolting after seeing a flurry of coons recently

invading us

out back, when I wasn't looking nearing dusk
laying out on my deck (fading sun) minding his own business
just when becoming domesticated - stable
was starting to feel pretty good
settling - collected 

shock - poof

running and running - Jesus! panting for air
getting lost fuck

gone all night, then all day - returning late
totally freaked out - shivering in the shadows
he's back and so glad to be home again
woofing down a bowl of food and a litre of water
in 27 seconds, before resting in peace
in his spot on my cozy sofa - inside

OK - WTF was that?

chill - "you're safe now
and I still love you" 

right, freedom - not all that cracked up
to what it's supposed to be

and yet  

no animal belongs in a cage  

he is so thankful that I'm still here for him
having been traumatized earlier by them
obviously having encountered raccoons
in the past - and losing

we can learn so much about our own vulnerable natures
from them - our little friends who didn't see it coming either 
blindsided by the twilight twister

for many it could be that haunting siren
looking up - dark sky - bombs falling

for others, a TV newsflash that a tornado
is just seconds away
and about to take out the entire trailer park
in one all consuming gulp
destroying everything


at any moment we could be dead and gone
for most, it's a reminder
of how fragile we are 

taking shelter
better prepared this time 

bottled water, canned food

I am convinced now - more than ever
that despite what we see and hear in the news
in what they want us to believe
in what they want from us

that there is a peaceful place for us here
that we can make this all work
only because we must

transcending trauma
is doable

t r a u m a t i z e d


and that in all this apocalyptic imagery
that surrounds us

we can still find our way
home again

dedicated to my best friend - Troy

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