Friday 15 January 2021

Visionary



change your heart - look around you


"the only language men ever speak perfectly
is the one they learn to speak in babyhood
when no one can teach them anything"

Maria Montessori



I S I O N A R Y








algebra?  why?
there's gotta be a reason
to learn this shit
because this whole 'reward' vs 'punishment' crap
just isn't working and

I'm not a numbers guy


chaos and confusion envelopes us early on
and we are filled with 'ideas' that throw us off course
ensconced in the world's insipid ideologies
handed down first by our parents
then our teachers/schools 
employers and so on
and on we go 











quarter century later
gravitating to the big city
because that's where we need to be
to be "in the loop"
a place where we can BE
someone 


today's special
flavour of the week
employee of the month
pushing forward because
that's what you're supposed
to do


it's no wonder why 
we need to 'medicate' 
in a jar


ah - all those precious memories


back to the days when young students - boys mostly
were strapped for misbehaving (boner, I mean bonus)
for their unwillingness to 
be compliant













I need your lovin' ... like the sunshine


in an abstract absence of empathy and humility
deliriously distracted denizens

 harassing those who are independent thinkers
for being unwilling to learn 
how to play the game
properly

it is a simple message
play by the rules and you'll be rewarded
question them and you'll be punished
plain and simple











truth is

we learn to 'adapt' to our surroundings
at an early age - reprimanded for rebelling
when in fact challenging the system 
is what all great thinkers did/do
to this day

only all too often many (most) of us are convinced 
early on that what we ultimately want
is something not possible

fear is instilled, then 
the waiting game begins

waiting for something better to come along
and release us from the cage
only it never does

accepting our fate, our chosen destiny
chosen by others - quietly coming to terms
with the crappy hand of cards we've been dealt because

that's just what you do
go ahead, have your way with me

I surrender



change your heart - look around you



I'm in heaven - I mean
ok, maybe I'll get lucky some day
maybe God will come down and give me a lap-dance
but only if I stick to the plan
and never question
the truth 

creature comforts
in the pleasure dome
glued to our sacred sacraments
in HD on our soiled screens

waiting
 











it's just a theory
that makes a lot more sense
to me 




I S I O N A R Y




as an artist/composer looking back
my favourite musical compositions are always
those created and conceived (and recorded) 
in a very short time-frame (minutes/hours)

thinking about it too much
just made it more elusive, distant
it's like it just arrives 
out of nowhere
 

with a simple invitation 














visionaries 
are those who see light in the darkness and quickly harness it
instead of ignoring the signs and signals

embracing them
turning nothing into something


change your heart
it will astound you 


if you care for your children
keep their environment uncluttered
free of useless gadgets and distractions
keep your conversation honest and straight-forward
free of control and manipulation
free of hidden agendas
free of fear
breathe












keeping one's decisions fair and generous
free of punishment and shame

and (most importantly) - free of blame

because fundamentally
we are all guilty 

of nothing





dedicated to Maria Montessori (1870-1952) 







Wednesday 2 December 2020

HEALER



"be faithful in small things
because it is in them - that your strength lies"

Mother Teresa



H E A L E R
  






 

it's an assumption


that fundamentally, we're all equal - embedded in the constitution
here in Canada especially - then there's "karma" 
then there's reality - the judgements - the walls of shame 
welcome to the fear factory - centuries of criminal behavior
 

conditionally condoned

adverse conditions creating chaos - abort alpha one charlie delta fox 
I'm going down - mayday - mayday - mayday
"requesting an emergency rescue evac - unknown co-ordinates 
on fire - crash and burn scenario subject seduction - with respect
just get your ass into the situation - now sir"

  I need a healer








"a man is but the product of his thoughts 
what he thinks, he becomes"

Mahatma Gandhi 


going down in flames
little chance of recovery
fading voices - shadowy shape shifters
downward spiral - blunt force - smoke - fire -
reverberation - condemnation into redemption

she lies next to me in silence - shields down - surrender 
darkened room - in port - docked - respite repair
only it's a haze - a dream - years ago with her
is this real

in our bedroom - early on

reaching over and touching my wounded shoulder during intimacy
when time stood still - before anything mattered - this
 a genuine gesture that feels good - caring
in war crimes - realizing time is short
in this moment - stillness

 
 



"you - are a healer", a simple acknowledgement 
spoken quietly in the presence of grace and humility
empathy - compassion - deliverance - she receives the message in form
no expectation - only loving, accepting resolve - nothing matters
only what is right here - right now ... you are everything
and you are nothing

"shhh - close your eyes now - sleep dear"


that caress along my receding hair line
that soft kiss on my cheek - drifting
into slumber  - ah
home 










"the wound ... is the place where the light enters you"

Rumi


no attachment - no shame - no pretension - no fallout - no "discussion"
no need to pretend and/or hide behind anything 
no cruel constructions  - no walls of blame - no borderlines
it's simple, I think - it's all about "listening" (not speaking)  
the truth ultimately unfolds in receiving information
taking it in gently










when she walks into a room  
my heart goes bing - bang - boom - "mommy"!
waking from a dream at 5am - heart pounding - so real OMG 
so right there - I could touch her - shivering shaking
I feel cold


we all are conditioned to give and take according to the plan
braised on high heat from the very beginning - barbecued chicken 
 deliciously sauced and served with a side of our choice 

 





for some it's religion - for others it's faith 
for others it's a simple good nights sleep
awakening into resolution and refreshment  
for me it's all of the above
I am thank-full - yes god - the affirmation
the adoration returning

thank you











H E A L E R




 
it doesn't matter who I am - or what I stand for
it's not about my conquests or my fears, regrets
accomplishments - mistakes
none of that

it's about my intention
in willingness to let go of everything
lose the baggage
ah

right here - right now












.

Thursday 19 November 2020

RUN LOLA RUN



lockdown 2 here
downshifting

it's been a good run
after lockdown 1 (March-June)
obsessed w/my new muse
doing a/v (youtube) remixes/uploading
daily cold swims - total blast - fun
3 albums - done

getting old - fuck
can't run anymore
my swims gone now



U N  L O L A  R U N







fog rolling in again - darker every day
this time - giving me
the shivers

time to rest & reflect
it's going to be a long, cold & lonely winter
in Toronto

goodnight beauties




R U N  L O L A  R U N
volume up














every second of every day
you make a choice, that can change
your life


optimized for night vision




a jim lamarche remix
assembled in photoshop, logic audio & final cut

featuring the Roland System 8














run lola run (1998)
x-filme creative pool
directed by: tom tykwer

source music: guillaume gonzales


 read more of Jim's blog posts here 


listen to the album ONE LIFE  >>>  HERE
(play all)










right
it's this 90's euro-thriller flick I just watched again
soo good

they frikkin' nailed it
I so enjoyed remixing this one
total blast

ok, it was her
she hooked
me in

her face












see the TEMPLE REDUX album/page here >>>



see the ONE LIFE album/page here >>>
http://www.jimlamarche.ca/onelife/


see the new TWO LIVES album/page here >>>
http://www.jimlamarche.ca/twolives/


see the new THREE LIVES album/page here >>>





Thursday 5 November 2020

THE TAKING




Ok.  I'm thinking
there are a lot of things
that aren't working here
time to make changes



T H E  T A K I N G
volume up - 720p














optimized for night vision




a jim lamarche remix
from the album TWO LIVES

assembled in photoshop, logic audio & final cut

featuring the Roland System 8















DIRECTED & PRODUCED BY:
Intuitive Society

CAMERA / CUT:
Monika Vaskorova

CHOREOGRAPHY / PERFORMANCE:
Dasa Horvathova



 read more of Jim's blog posts here 


listen to the album ONE LIFE  >>>  HERE
(play all)















see the TEMPLE REDUX album/page here >>>



see the ONE LIFE album/page here >>>
http://www.jimlamarche.ca/onelife/


see the new TWO LIVES album/page here >>>
http://www.jimlamarche.ca/twolives/


see the new THREE LIVES album/page here >>>





Tuesday 3 November 2020

US & THEM - a discussion on ideological preferences




A few months ago, I engaged in a discussion with a friend whom I’ve known for years (my age) at the fitness centre where we both swim here in High Park Toronto.  This was our first exchange on the subject of politics and I was surprised to find out he was a hard-line Conservative, Trump loyalist and anti-masker.   Never knew that about him.  Eastern European in descent having lived in Canada most of his adult life, a musician, Dad like me (retired/daughter same age) but having been employed in a ‘real job’ for many many years, having endured some tough times earlier on and carrying a whole lot resentment.






 



Our ideological preference was a discovery for both of us and there was a newfound moment of alertness that eased somewhat as the conversation continued.  The word recoil comes to mind.  That said, I believe we both softened once realizing that a serious conflict wasn’t worth the trouble, nor should it dampen the hundreds of casual disclosures we’ve shared over the years.  Safe to say we have a genuine fondness for each other as fellow humans.  I’m wishfully thinking it’s what years of experience has taught us, both knowing that our intransigence on this topic would likely not waver … appreciating our differences and prepared to incrementally explore them in that moment.  Silence …


“So you’re a Trudeau lover”, he defiantly asked with a peering indignant look … “you think we should have open borders and let anyone in who wants to come here” sensing a tension escalation in his practiced broken english.  His assertion was more a stubborn proclamation this time; not so much a question but more a statement (of fact), like he already had me figured out - one of them.   What I got in that moment was his need to widen the polarity as far as it could go, stretch it tight … his white, my black - his right, my wrong … his freedom - my threat to that freedom; all the crazy crap amplified over the past 4 years.  In this world the light switch is either on or off, light or dark - no greyscale let alone colour.  Conclusive.









“No, I’m not a Trudeau lover just thankful it’s him running the country”, I said.  Now he’s looking even more agitated with a ‘what’s that supposed to mean’ look.  Continuing … “well let's just say that I respect all those who have made this their home, here now”.  Confused silence … “but Jimmy this is not their home” he said, really needing me to get this.  “Yes it is” I calmly reiterated.  “As for open borders, definitely not” I said … “but we need educated newcomers with skills for our economy to survive & compete globally” (thinking go easy).  “Immigration law in Canada is strict and there’s a very real criteria/rules one needs to have to qualify to stay & work and it’s not so simple”.  “Ok” he said, “so then they get here then they bring their whole family here too, when there are ‘real’ Canadians who are unemployed and need help”.  Everything is stretched to the max thinking this is going to be a tough sell, articulating my (obviously flawed) reasoning.  "You see, Canadians often lack the skills/education needed/required for the job, that's why most of the doctors in rural Canada were born in other countries - supply & demand".   Now there's a sense of internal fuming in the silence, continuing.  "Your fruits & vegetables ...  foreigners often do things and go places we 'Canadians' won't do or go to - we need them."


Wrapping my wet suit in my towel and putting it in my gym bag, zipping it up.  Quiet.  His head now shaking almost in disbelief (thinking it just might explode).  Black or white, light or dark - no variation.  The troops are dug in and they’re not going anywhere - pause.  Twenty seconds passing, looking over at him.  “They need to be deported … sent back”, he defiantly remarked.  Extended silence.









Referring to him by his first name ... “Where were you born?”, I asked.  “Lithuania” he earnestly replied.  Contemplating the fallout of where this was going, still risking it … “So maybe you need to be deported too” I said.  His jaw slightly dropped.  Dumbfounded, disgust.  “You’re crazy” his last words to me, walking away.  I’ve seen him a dozen or so times since and it’s almost as if that conversation never happened.  Like we both know not to go there.  


I’m fine with that.